Wednesday, June 6, 2012

Avoiding Politics

So, I hate politics. I mean I try to be educated and everything and vote, but I hate talking to others about my political views. No matter what party you or the other person are it always ends in yelling/crying/eye rolling/declarations of war. Once a person told me that the person I was voting for "ate babies". Political talks always go way down hill in logic the longer they are talked about.

 Besides politics for the most part aren't very interesting to me, I'd rather talk about why the school of zombie thought where the person is actually dead and then is reanimated is dying out. (Why is that? It's all about the virus that makes you crazy and breaks you down until you're dead now.) I'm not even going to tell you which political party I vote for because that is not the point.

The point is that the parties all have one very big thing in common, one thing that brings us all together. They both send way too many annoying emails and call me way too many times. Recently they've actually had real people on the phones which makes me feel a little bad when I hang up on them. So, I've decided to come up with someone ways to get them to hang up on me.

1) (The most logical answer) Tell them I am the opposite party of whatever they are.

2) I can't vote for anyone else because I am also running for President. I'll explain that while I'm legally too young to do that, my 10 cats/campaign managers tell me that we can find a loophole.

3) Tell them that I don't believe in Presidents and I'm currently working to get the US back under British control. Monarchy is so in right now.

4) I'm voting for Batman

5) I'm no longer allowed to vote because of that whole Darth Vader cult incident.

6) I was born on leap year so I'm actually not old enough to vote.